Inspired by my Father in laws "quote book", it will only be the funniest, and most though provoking of statements, I am gonna try not to do too much mushy shit, its just for laughs after all.

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

fantisies of neglect

Holy shit you guys. Holy. SHIT.

That could pretty much some up my week. Back to school is a dirty, pushy whore with festering herpes. Not school it self mind you, but the entire season, known as "back-to-school". From the first asshole at Walmart, who airs the first commercial in July, to, about Halloween. I know, a lot of Moms LOVE back to school, and maybe, someday, when my kids are at the same damn school, and both there all damn day, I will be able to enjoy it too. But for now, why in the shit would I want to give up sleep in, lazy beach days, for getting up early, endless bitching (from all of us), and being a fucking taxi, in what is ALWAYS the hottest time of year in SD. (When the powers that be can figure this out and let the kids out in July, and back at the end of Sept, I will be so amazed, I will lick my own ass. I will. I swear.)

Anyway, in between all the bitching (okay, okay, mostly me), and tears (me again), and UNHOLY fits being thrown in public, resulting in bite marks, and head lumps (me, on the receiving end of this shit), they have said a few things that have made me smile through my tears.

Finn (on the way home from dropping Reid at school today): Mom, You really need to have another baby.

Me (emotionless from all the meds): Why in the world would I do that?

Finn: Because I NEED another brother. I gotta have another brother. Maybe a couple more brothers. I need more brothers mooooom, I neeeeeeeed some.

Me: Finn if I have another baby, I wont have as much time to spend with you and Reidy.

Finn: I really dont care 'bout that mom. I just need more brothers.

Me: why do you need them so bad?

Finn: Cause Daddy has ALL those brothers, and I want a lot of brothers too. Come on mom. More brothers.

(A special thinks to Kate, Dale, Alan and Jeri, for giving me this standard to live up to)

Reid: Mom, do you know what my favorite day ever would be?

Me: No Reid, what?

Reid: If I got up in the morning, and started playing video games, and then you forgot about me all day, and I played all day long, till Daddy got home, and was like "Wheres Reid?" And you'd be like "Oh! I guess hes still playing video games, I forgot all about him"

Me: so...your best day if your Mother forgets you exist. That right? I got that right?

Reid: Yeah. Just until the night. Its okay Mom, I wouldn't be mad or anything.

Moral of the stories, my children, not unlike myself, fantasize about being neglected. Cant say I fucking blame 'em. I think we could ALL use a little neglect around here.

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