Finn: Do you wanna play freeze tag Sammy???
Finn: No? Yes? No? (laying on top of her) Do you wanna play golf? No? Yeah?
Finn: Oh, okay, you wanna be petted? Like this?
Sammy: MEERRROOOOOOOOW HIIISSSS!
Finn: Oh, okay, like this?
Finn: No? Oh, sorry. Like this??
Sammy: MEEEERRRRRROOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW HIIIIIISSSSSSSS!
Finn: Okay, Sammy, Okay, Ill go away.
Finn: Mom you hold this (cardbord wrapping paper tube) and sa-weeze (squeeze) it and sa-weeze it, and if it bends, don't give it back to me, and if it doesn't bend, give it back to me.
Me: Okay (squeezing the tube, bending the tube) it bent. (holding the tube)
Finn: No. Mom! Sa-weeze it, and sa-weeze it, and it if bends..
Me: it did, it bent so I am not giving it back right?
Finn: NO. No, no, no, no, no. HOLD the tube. Okay Mom? SA-WEEZE it and sa-weeze it. If it doesn't bend keep trying.
Me: It did bend. It already did.
Finn: NO. Mom. Will you listen? Sa-weez it. And keep trying to sa-weeze it, and if it bends, don't give it back to me. Understand. Do you understand?
Me: *throws self in to on coming traffic, and head explodes at the same time*
5 years ago