Finn, On The Life Of a Busy 4 Year Old;
Finn is sitting in Daddys chair, watching Disney Jr, cuddling Monkey and sucking his thumb.
Finn: (looooong sigh) It a BIG day today.
Me: Oh really, what so "big" about it?
Finn: Ya know Mom, just, lots to do today.
Me: Why? What have you done besides sit on your ass and watch TV today?
Finn: Well, I am just gonna build a lot of machines and stuff, so, its gonna be big.
Hey, MOM. I HAVE TO GO PEE, SO IAM GONNA GO IS THAT OKAY!!!!???
Me: Jesus Finn, yes. I have told you a thousand time you don't have to clear it with me before you piss, and I am RIGHT HERE, so you don't have to yell either.
Finn: (In the bathroom) Okay, go pee, wash my hands and get back to watchin' TV.
Finn: Hey Mom, Grandma has this finger puppet, its a butterfly!
Me: Cool, sounds pretty.
Finn: Well, actually it a moth, and you have to stick your finger up its butthole.
Reid: Yeah *sigh* sometimes you have to do that.
Thankfully he didn't make mention of the squirrel puppet you have to fist.
On Good Parenting:
Finn: When I grow up, I am NEVER gonna spank my kids.
Me: Oh yeah? Never? You just going to let them do what ever they want?
Finn: No! When they do something bad, I am just gonna kick 'em in the junk.
Reid, On Listening;
Reid: Hey Mom, tell Dad about your day today.
Me: What about it?
Reid: Tell him how busy it was. Like you were telling us in the car.
Me: Oh, he knows how busy it was, he knows allll about it.
Reid: Just tell him, ya know like you told us, like "Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, took a shower, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah.
Me: Clearly that conversation was a waste of time. Is that what you think I did all day? Take a shower.
5 years ago