Inspired by my Father in laws "quote book", it will only be the funniest, and most though provoking of statements, I am gonna try not to do too much mushy shit, its just for laughs after all.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Penises need not apply

A gray eyelash. A mother fucking gray eyelash. I blame you spawn. In the last 24 hours I have become the proud owner of a gray eyelash. Some of the quotes that could have possibly scared the pigment out of the fucker:

"I did something really mean to the cat, but I don't want to tell you what it was."

"I think I only throwed up 'cause there were a lots of boogers in my throat"

"Ha ha ha! I just called the hair tie a hair PIE! Hair pie, hair pie, hair pie!" (loudly, in the grocery store)

"Mom! Have you seen the tarantula?!?!"

Spent most of the day yesterday making a "pretend mixed berry and sea weed pie" with Finn. It was inedible berries from the yard, and weeds, of course, and it was heavily armed with guns and swords baked right in. He is the perfectly engineered cross between Martha Stewart and Rambo. My plan is working, kind of.

Hum, I guess the last 24 hours, have been nothing out of the ordinary. Maybe it was just that eyelashes time? Ya know "the circle of life" and all that shit?....nah, it was the kids.

P.S. I told Miah that yarmulke (ya know, that little skull cap the Jewish dudes wear) was spelled with a "R" and an "L", and he didnt believe me (cause, why would he?) and I was right!!! I was right fuckers! About spelling! Woo hoo! Look out Steven Hawking, I am one smart bitch!!

P.P.S (Ladies only, penises need not apply) what do I do about the lash? Pluck it, or mascara it? Its on the bottom. Please advise.


  1. Eyelashes can turn grey!? Wow, you are old. Haha kidding. :) Just leave it there I highly doubt someone is going to come up to you and say, "OH. EM. GEE. Did you know one of your lashes is grey...?" Unless it's me.

  2. Well of course they aren't going to SAY anything, but they'll be staring at it, and trying not to stare it, therefor staring it more. If there is on thing I don't like, its to be looked at for extended periods of time, directly in the face. Blend. That's my motto. Ambitious, I know.

  3. I would pluck it out!! I used to dream of getting my hands on that Padres Coach that had a whole row of grey eyelashes and pull all of them out out out.