Inspired by my Father in laws "quote book", it will only be the funniest, and most though provoking of statements, I am gonna try not to do too much mushy shit, its just for laughs after all.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

There is NO what

I know kids ask questions. I get it. Its fine. Its even pretty cool, that they question authority, and religion, and TV and everything else in the universe. But you know whats not cool? When they question ME. I am not talking the "why is the sky blue?" or "why cant I have cake for breakfast". Sure those are hard to answer, or frustrating, but at least they make sense. The caliber of questions Finn has been pounding me with lately, leave me questioning my own identity, sanity, capability, and sexual orientation. And anyone who ever said "There is no such thing as a dumb question!" (in a nasal, school marmy voice) has never met my kids. Questions, that do not even follow the logical linear path of the conversation we are having. Questions, like this...

Finn: Mom, are pants with holes in the knees cool?

Me: yep.

Finn: How?

Me: "How?" What do you mean, "How?".

Finn: How are they?

Me: I don't know "how", they just are. "How" is not really applicable in this situation.

Finn: Why?

Me: Because, It doesn't make sense, there is no reason "how" they are cool.

Finn: Where?

Me: Anywhere. Wait, you kn..... Finn, PLEASE stop asking dumb questions. Sometimes there is no "how" or "why". Sometimes there is no "when", or "where", okay Finn?

Finn: Okay Mommy, okay, I got you, I got you.....Mommy?

Me: Yes Finn?

Finn: What?

Finn: (in deep, mechanical Darth Vader voice) Mom. Come, to the Dark Side.

Me: Uh, I don't really want to Finn.

Finn: (Normal lispy Finn voice) S'okay Mom, Its not really that dark here.

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