Did you guys know there are 2 teams in my house? No? Neither did I, Reid has informed me the there indeed two factions within the McCord walls.
Reid, Finn, and Miah are on the "Wiener Team", and I, all by my lonesome, am the soul member of the most awesomest "Team Vagina".
The Wiener team excels at "wrestling", "riding things", and "playing games". Team Vagina strengths are, "resting" (awesome), and, get this, "NOT driving". Yea, that's right, according to my son, I am really good at NOT driving. So if any of you bitches wanna have a "NOT drive-athon, better bring you fuckin' "A" game, that goes for a "resting" contest too.
Team Vagina's new goal in life is to find a friend names Scott, so I can call him Scott the Twat. Not like in a mean way, in a "you are totally my best friend so I can call you twat" kind of way. You guys know what I mean, like I only call my closest girlfriends "Bitch Face", if I don't like you I will most likely not even waste a cuss word on you. I save "Whore Bag" for only the people that I really love, like my daughter*, or your mom.
*I don't have a daughter, (obviously, cause I am the only person on Team Vagina) but if I did, there is no doubt in my mind she would actually be a "Whore Bag", cause the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, right?
5 years ago